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16June2019

Intimacy4us

Ten Erection killers!

He sits back snug against the pillows and watches his wife get ready for bed. All the signs are there that she is in the mood, but for some or other reason his penis isn’t quite as eager to play along. Usually by this time, blood flow to the veins are firmly in place.

She crawls into bed with him and presses her soft curves against his body. But instead of shifting his hands underneath her nighty, he just throws one arm over her and holds her tightly. He hears how her breathing softly intensifies in anticipation of his touch. He too is lying and waiting for the old stiffy to kick in.
Nothing.
After a while she moves her hand downwards towards his lower body and massages his penis.
“Looks like I will have to shake someone awake,” she says playfully.
Her attempts are however, in vain, and after a while she asks rather surprised what’s wrong. He just shrugs. She immediately thinks that she did something wrong and starts flooding him with questions. Is it her perfume? Does he want them to switch the lights on during sex? Must they try a new position?
“Hang on, the problem doesn’t lie with you,” he eventually stops her. “It just doesn’t want to get erect.”
She suggests that she stimulate it with her mouth, and he eagerly complies. It sparks a reaction!
He places his wife on her back, ready to penetrate, just to find that his penis retreats back into its shell like a shy tortoise.
“Now what!” he says out loud and throws his arms up in the air.
She switches the bedside lamp on and looks with big eyes at how he sulkily sits on the edge of the bed.
“Maybe you are just rushing it,” she says carefully. “I don’t mind if we try again.”
“It won’t help,” he grumbles. “The guys at work said this would happen!”
“What’s going to happen?” she asks baffled.
“Well, you know. Age.”
His wife reaches an “ah-ha” moment. Of course, at the end of the month he turns 45.
“”I’m no doctor, but I don’t think you should lend your ears out to everything that your colleagues say.”
“My love, I don’t want to be one of those losers that has to drink pills to get an erection,” he says abruptly.”
“And even if you have to, what’s wrong with that? I won’t think any less of you.”
“Yes, but . . .”
“But nothing! There is nothing to be scared or shy of. You remember Donald, Karlien’s husband?”
He rolls his eyes. “Yes, the one that you all think is so sexy.”
“He had erection problems quite a while back. His job was very stressful and on top of that he was a heavy smoker. He did however, get the necessary help and today all is well with him again.”
“Really? That guy’s like Superman, and he is younger than me! I would’ve never guessed that!” he says surprised.
“You see! Anyone can overcome it and there are many things that can cause it – not just age. Let’s rather get an expert’s opinion as opposed to your friends’, what do you say?”

What can prevent you from getting an erection?

  • Depression: It can dampen your desire and lead to erectile dysfunctions. Ironically enough, several anti-depressants can also repress your sex drive and make an erection difficult to achieve.
  • Performance anxiety: Worrying about your ability to perform in bed can actually cause your penis not to play along.
  • Medication: There are several types of medication (for example blood pressure, pain or anxiety) that can cause erectile dysfunction. Consult your doctor.
  • Low self-image: If you don’t like what you see in the mirror, then you will be worried that your partner feels the same way. For some people it means added stress to do things in the bedroom that will make up for a low self-image.
  • Low libido: It’s not rocket science – if you are just not in the mood for sex, it will be difficult to get an erection. If your desire, however is often stifled, it is time to look at your physical and psychological health.
  • Low testosterone levels: Testosterone is the petrol that fuels your sex drive. If you, for one-or-other reason, find yourself without “petrol”, then your penis won’t just jump up and say “GO”.
  • Alcohol: A few drinks can get you in the mood, but take too much and your penis will have a hangover before you do. Moderation is key.
  • Overweight: Extra body fat lowers testosterone levels and your self-esteem, and can mean bye-bye libido.
  • Smoking: Nicotine narrows the veins and hampers blood flow to the penis.
  • Health problems: Different health problems can influence the nerves, muscles or blood flow needed to achieve an erection. These include diabetes, high blood pressure, and hardening of the veins, spinal cord injuries and multiple sclerosis.